you know what ultimately pisses me off, dear reader? someone who is loved and regarded in the highest esteem for something i find worthless or contrived. a petty thing, i know. but at the very quick of it all, i can be a very petty and selfish bastard. i'm as judgemental as all hell sometimes and carry my own ideas of elite like talismans or tender. don't we all? well, most of us.
i am jealous. i seethe and fuel it and sometimes it's hard to help myself. i raised myself and steeled my youth with fashioned hatred. it's rooted deep, and no matter how precisely i excise the heart of it all, its weeds eventually spew up and outward, unhindered by manners or even desecration.
i wonder if there's a limit for how many times you can get away with being The Dispicable by scolding yourself later. there must be. it's like anything. you dip into your vices only so long before the little picture-frame lies begin to lose a bit of substance and The Big Reversal kicks in. The Big Reversal...you so gotta watch out for that fucking bitch.

have i mentioned that i'm prone to bouts of extreme hypocracy? fuck around.




Hidden Agenda

Interventions
by those most compelled and
least responsible.
Most appropriate and
least deserving.
Most able. Least ready.
Only hope.
Last chance.
One against two makes three to dance.
Denial Insults Loss
I'm so fucking in love with you still.
I am the road for you to walk upon.
Say something
back me up.
Help....just
Please....once
Listen....only
face me.
Stop him.
Safely
shun them.

Spit it out. Breathe in.
Kiss me
Kiss me
Kiss me
and not him.